How to Handle Sibling Rivalry
Although many siblingsget on like friends, it’s not unusual for them to fight too. One minute theylove each other dearly and the next minute they cannot stand the sight of eachother. Usually, sibling rivalry begins when a second child is born and childrenthen begin to complete for attention or even for toys. As a parent, it can bedifficult and stressful to watch your children fighting with each other, butit’s about knowing how to know intervene or whether you should intervene atall. There are steps that you can take to help your children to get along witheach other and for you to therefore be able to live in a calm, stress freehome.
Sibling Rivalry
Quite often rivalryoccurs because of competition or jealousy. There are also other reasons ask towhy rivalry between siblings occurs. For example:
Copied Behaviour
The way that we handle issues or disagreements affect the way thatour children also handle similar problems. For instance, if the adults in ahousehold resolve a problem in a productive and decent manner, it’s more likelythat your children will also behave in a similar way when they have an issuewith somebody.
Personalities
A child’s individual personality is a factor when it comes torivalry. For example, if one child is easily irritated and another child is morepassive, it’s more likely that they will rub each other up the wrong way.
Different needs
Children react differently to situations depending on their age.For instance, young children, such as toddlers are more protective of theirbelongings and therefore are reactive if somebody else touches theirbelongings. On the other hand, older children may not understand why a youngerchild gets what they see as preferential treatment.
How To Deal With Sibling Rivalry
It is best not to get involved where possible. However, if you cansee that there’s a risk of physical harm, then you will need to step it. If youjust get involved at any opportunity, your children will rely upon you toalways be there for them, to solve their issues.
If you do ever need to get involved, you need to consider theseaspects:
First of all, separate your children from eachother until they have you both calmed down. It is worth giving them time apartfrom each other, especially if you want to use this opportunity to teach yourchildren about their behaviour.
Who is to blame is not a factor that you need tospend a lot of time on. Ultimately, it usually takes two to create a fight andtherefore both children need to be held responsible.
Try to end the situation by both children gainingsomething. For example, if your children are fighting over the same toy,perhaps remove the toy and suggest that they play together with something elseinstead.
How To Help Prevent Sibling Rivalry Going Forward
You need tomake sure that your children understand what behaviour is deemed as acceptable.Make sure your children know that you do not tolerate yelling, door slamming,name calling or fighting. Your children also need to know the consequences ofbreaking these rules.
Try to makethe effort to give your children one-to-one attention. If one of your childrenlikes to draw, then spend time drawing with them. If another child like to goto the park, then take them to the park.
Explain to your children that everything is not always equal. For example, a younger child may need more of you time in some instances than an older child.